Wednesday 21 January 2015

Standing Against The Odds - Desmond Tong


Sometimes you don't know how strong you are, until being strong is the only choice you have.  

Looking at this bubbly face, you'd never guess what he has previously gone through
This is a true story of a young brave man, who lost everything he had, but despite the severe circumstances, despite all the odds against him, he chose to fight on and give himself a new lease of life.

 
I am honored to meet the man, Desmond Tong, to learn about his inspiring story over some uniquely roasted coffee and deliciously sinful ice chocolate over at Collective Brewers.



Waking up every morning, he'd start the day with a basketball game with his boys, followed by a scrumptious lunch before roughing it out in Judo training through the afternoon. Talking, laughing with friends, and always looking forward to riding his Yamaha WR200 dirt bike back home for dinner and trail riding on weekends.


Desmond, who was the youngest among three children in the family, was as active as can be. He excelled in both academics and sports. Since his teens, he represented Singapore for Judo and Singapore Armed Forces Sports Association (SAFSA) in the army. He was also involved in competitive basketball, badminton, rugby, hockey. You name it.

However, it was all gone in one evening.

That fateful day, he told his mom that he is going out to meet some friends and will be back soon.

He never made it back.

Credits to autogespot
At a four-way cross junction on Victoria Street (the same fatal accident site as the Ferrari and a Taxi in 2012), he got hit head on by a Taxi.

Credits to omakson
Lost, shocked, and injured, Desmond remained conscious upon impact as he was still numb of any pain from his devastating injury due to adrenalin. Blood was gushing out and staining the ground like an oil spillage, all yet to his unknown.

His right leg was severed, from shin down with a crushed ankle with his tibier broken (the part between the knee and the ankle)

He was losing blood fast.

In fact, too much, too fast.

Credits to flickr
The ambulance rushed over and he was immediately sent to the Emergency Operation Room where without further delay, the doctors anxiously tried to stop the bleeding.

Everything happened so fast, it was all in chaos.

Barely an hour ago, Desmond was joking and laughing about what not with his friends.

Now, he is grappling for his life.


The nurses regretfully advised his family members to prepare for the worse. Due to the excessive blood loss, Desmond had a slim chance of making it through that night.

His mom almost passed out upon the news. She was about to lose her youngest son, just like that.

After many hours in the operating room, the doctors finally came out where Desmond's worried parents received the news - He is in stable condition, but they could not guarantee the salvation of his right leg.

Credits to straitstimes
Over the next few months, Desmond underwent 6 major operations, bravely facing one every 2 weeks consecutively, scarred with over 300 stitches all over his masculine body.

The doctors did their best to re-attach his broken leg with numerous metal fixators; from abstracting muscles to skin grafting, replacing flaps and arteries, but unfortunately, to no avail. The blood circulation down to the broken leg was repeatedly unsuccessful. Due to open wound infections and further vascular complications, the doctors eventually had to amputate his right leg.

Physically, Desmond was in pain.

Mentally, he was already tipping over the verge of breaking down.

Deep in his heart, he just couldn't take this nightmare anymore.

His life was crushed, his soul was destroyed.

Credits to huffingtonpost
After being discharged from the hospital, Depression sunk in swiftly as he spent the next 12 months without leaving his room. This was his darkest moments of his life. He severed all connections from the world; his friends, his family. All he had were cigarettes and the accident on replay in his head. 

Friends tried to reach out but he would shut them all out. Dreams of walking again was terribly destroyed.

Credits to therealsingapore

Alas, he decided to end it all and commit the unthinkable - Suicide.

He told his dearest mother about it, all the preparations he has made and all that he will leave behind.
As he was about to helplessly take that leap off the building, his mom whispered painfully with tears rolling down her face,

"I can't stop you from jumping, son. But I will follow you."

There and then, it halted all his thoughts of suicide because he knew, he can't do this to mother.

Credits to stasiareport
15 years has passed on, Desmond is now a Prosthetist/Orthotist at Tan Tock Seng Hospital. He also volunteers regularly at the Amputee Support Group, Amputee Sports Activities Passion Group to help those who were once where he was.

He has also been featured on TODAY, The Straits Times and you can watch a video of his story HERE.


Desmond who was a scholar, has later found himself a place as a National Archer in Team Singapore, competing in the Paralympics. He have also went on to represent Singapore in the 7th Asean Para Games in 100m Sprint and Discus throw.


Not only that, but yes! He is back on two wheels!


Not on the road of course, but during his leisure off-road fun when he travels overseas. He shared that the thing he loves most about dirt biking are the very obstacles that are placed before him to overcome, and no matter how many times he falls, he gets back up.


The insurmountable courage and faith Desmond has gathered to overcome obstacles that were arduously punishing thrown at him is truly commendable.



I hope this story inspires - There is nothing we cannot do.

Every problem comes with a solution.
It's whether you are determined enough to patiently find the answer.

If you want something, you'll find a way.
If not, you'll find an excuse. 

If you have a dream, don't let anyone or anything take that away. Build it strong and courageously, live the very life that you have strive for because the truth is, whether you say you can or can't, you are right.